10th Anniversary of my Vigil at the Runestone

I was here.

Near as I can tell, it was 10 years ago, Wed Aug 9 2000, when I sat at the Runestone in the cold, damp dark, and heard words of love, praise, wisdom, and caution, having been startled clean out of my wits earlier that day by being put on vigil by my Queen, Elana, at an impromptu court in Midrealm Royal.

Upon returning home from Warre, I wrote this missive, and sent it to both the Apprentice List, and the MK Laurel list.


                                      


Being a compendium of all things great and wonderful that happened to me upon the occasion of my elevation to the Laurel.

Item, that I'm not going to write this one by itemizing everything.  there was much rejoicing!

Well, first off, let me thank the thankees, with ful devout herte, and in no particular order:

* Baroness Maria and Baron Gareth, for coming so far and holding with pride the banner of the Barony of Illiton in my procession.

Banners in the ready
before the ceremony.

* Nikidemus, Conor, "baby bro" Rasaad, Finn, and Olaf for carrying (I think) banners in my procession. And Lee for carrying a new peer's banner, which Berach made and secretly added to my procession (although, in truth, had Berach asked *me* to carry it, it still would have remained a secret from me!).

* Viscount Miles for speaking on my behalf, as a royal Peer, with but a scant moment's notice, when other friends couldn't make it at the last minute.

* And to those other friends, I hope all is well now.

* Of course, to Her Excellency Mistress Alexis  McAlister of Beverlay, and in like manner to The Honorable Lordship Master Charles Oakley, for speaking on my behalf (or so I'm told, I dunno really, I wasn't there at that time then nohow).

* Grizel, for th'excellent idea of having the children sweep my way in, which in sooth won more compliments that day than any other thing, including my laurel , for which I haven't stopped hating you yet! DIE GRIZEL SCUM DIE!!!!! Oops, I bet that was one of those 'inappropriate' speaking things I'm supposed to watch out for, now that I'm a Laurel. Please delete that last bit from your email.

* Her Excellency Myfanwy of Ceredigion, my own Baroness and Ladye of my House, for gushing with joy at my good fortune. And know ye that Baronesses of this calibre are not accustomed to gushing, but more the usual will they generously strew favour upon those whose actions pleasure their noble whim. And so such was more gift than ever I expected from my friend, and longtime inspiration, Myfanwy.

(Half of) Signy, Alexis, & Grizel

* "Mommy", Mistress Signy Dimmradaela, now of Meridies, but at whose  house I first joined the SCA, and at whose house I (finally) learned to sew, after a lifetime of wanting to know how, but it was woman's work, so my own mother wouldn't let me, for which and similar antithetical pairs I am more apt to call Signy "Mommy". Anyway, and for letting me sew through the night in preparation for my first Pennsic (XVI, Eislinn's War), which was a month away, and was my first event. But I was already a full-fledged SCAdian, before ever I set foot in her house, so there never was no culture shock, and have been Broom since a week from that first day, and in truth "Joe Marfice" is a persona I play at work, while Broom is my own personality. And know ye that Signy rode her horse all the way from Southdowns (Atlanta, GA) to Flaming Gryphon (SW Ohio), for my ceremony.

Ser Berach & me, before the ceremony
(photo by John Steele)

* Ser Berach, my knight and friend, for the peer's banner he made me, for his comely speech on my behalf, and for humbling me (which, most sinfully, my pride did grow upon!). But more on that later.

* Helen of Greyfells, of Ealdormere,  for the wondrous three garments *and* hosen she made me, and all her support, and love, and for keeping me sane and on track in the final days before my elevation. Really. Needed some corraling, I did. And, for coming down all the way from Ealdormere.



* Meghan, Sarah, and Marshal, for doing a fine job of sweeping away the bad luck before me.

Young William Marshal Finke
prepares to sweep!

* Arglydd Dafydd, for speaking on my behalf as a Pelican, and giving me a sound ear to bounce things off of, for his ears are like the gum of a rubber tree in sooth. (This next part may sound fake, but it's true: IT'S REALLY HARD FOR ME TO TYPE THESE WORDS IN MODERN ENGLISH!!! I KEEP WANTING TO SPELL THEM OLDE!)

OK, back to it.

* Shannon and Badger, who made me a wonderful new cote of scarlet and white, embroidered with laurels, and a black velvet hood, AND AS YOU EXPECTED THE SLEEVES ARE ABOUT 2-3" SHORT, BY THE WAY, so I'm glad you have more material, and you're both sweeties.

* My lady and love, Theresa Alverez of the Barony of the Debatable Lands, for bringing the wreath of laurel leaves with which I was crowned a Master. For though we only started this adventure at War, yet we have already travelled so many wonderful miles together.


* Then-prince, now my king, Edmund, for taking the time to seek me out just before my elevation, and congratulate me, although I know his day was busier yet than mine!

* And to anyone I've forgot, with apologies, of course: I wasn't really there, so please don't blame me for not remembering what others saw!

Now, on to the event.

Myfanwy & my
then-girlfriend Teresa

Mistress Alexis, whose favor I am honored to carry forward into battle, came forward into the court of their graces the king and queen Dag & Elayna to beg a boon (or so I am told). She spoke of my work within her knowledge, and within her barony, and then (or so I am told) invited Master Charles (the popinjay) to speak of my days within the barony of Illiton. He did so, cad though he be, and they (I am told) begged that I be let into the order of the Laurel, because apparently the Laurel was grown thick in the Midrealm and needed some sort of thinning by virtue of the introduction of wild and unkempt strains (or so I imagine).

The Order was called forward, no doubt tricked into believing that his grace intended to share pizza, but in sooth he asked them something, which might have been (in my hearing) "Does everybody here like pepperoni?", and loudly then did they all cry "Yay!" Well, what would you do?

But in sooth, they were surely tricked, for he must have muttered under his breath, "...and count Emrys to be numbered amongst your order?". And his herald, Arglydd Dafydd, that some call Master Taffy, called Emrys Eustace into court.

And I had been much kept with the ordering of my friends, holding banners and getting confused by my simple instructions to take these banners, and stand there thus, and then to reverse their order, because the first order was the way they would stand at the last, but would walk in in reverse order, and then they could leave in the same standing order which is the way they were standing now but not reversed except from the way they would walk in which was the first way I had them ordered and were there any questions and to my surprise there were. And that took some time.

Sarah & Meghan sweeping 'fore me.

Grizel took some of my brooms, which I have collected and received as presents over the years ("Whatter we gonna give Broom this year?" "Dunno, how about a broom?" "Perfect! Scratch another off the shopping list!"), and gave them to Berach & Myfanwy's kids Meghan and (Wm.) Marshal (Esq.-to-be), and Olaf & 'Stacia's daughter Sarah, who was playing "He loves me - He loves me not" with the broom straw, but there was more much straw in the brooms than game in Sarah! She had them lead the procession in, sweeping away the bad luck, which is an ancient wedding tradition of the English from before the time of the Conqueror, and I was after all a bachelor, for I was not yet a knight nor master, but about to change that status, so it was something like a wedding.
Except for the tuxes, and the mother-in-laws fighting.

The children entered at the front, Myfanwy guiding them, and the whole of the crowd merrily busting a verray right and soothful gut at the sight of it all, and then followed my banners in reverse order. At the back, the banners stopped one by one, each passing the previous in turn, until they had reversed into their final positions, and in order then from the back was:
 
* a house I joined at the beginning, Boreyne (with that animal in red on yellow),

* and my knightly house Winterbourne (the white wolf, engorged of a baronial coronet and tethered with a knightly chain, all on blue),* the Shadowdancers (white & black diamond, counterchanged on a zigzag diagonal), the Purple Frettied and utterly finest scouts in the Known Worlde, 

* Barony Illiton (the mermaid on the white stripe on blue),
 

Luigi carrying the baronial banner

* and Barony Flaming Gryphon (yellow gryphon enflamed red on an ermine background),

* and finally my personal arms (the 3 red peapod thingies on the yellow - "Or, three broom's peascods gules", or in 14th-c jargon, "Or, three broomes coddes redde").

Grizel came in sweeping just before me (or so I'm told), and I followed in, until Marshal decided to make a pit stop and came back to talk to me in the center of the aisle. Berach scooped him up, and I proceeded to the front.

The king asked if there was a knight who would speak for me, and lo! there was, and my knight most gallantly came forth, and as is very typical for him, stole the whole show away (except for the children sweeping, of course) with his lively bearing and knightly manner, boldly saying what no man had thought to say before, of which I remember nothing. And then he did say to the king that he was sure of all my chivalric virtues, except that of humility, that the French call "humilite", but now in the reign of good king Edmund we know such base frank speech to be vulgar, and so call it "homblenesse", which is a good English virtue. So anyway, he doubted my humbleness, and asked
permission to strike me, as was his right, to remind me of my station before him as squire.

His grace the king had given permission previously for this blow, but of course wished that it not be claimed as a 'last blow', which it most certainly would not be, and thought (as did I when I asked the king) that it would be given to me before the court began, privately. But my knight had another idea, and intended not to strike me in private vigil, but in front of the assembled crowd, the court and princes, their majesties, the assembled hosts in heaven, god almighty, and some kitchen crew who were on break from shredding cabbage.

His grace the king assented to this request, but asked that it be done after my elevation, and I think the sudden reordering confused him a bit. As we shall see.

Then Mistress Signy, Principal (first) Court Baroness of the Midrealm, spoke on my behalf as a Laurel, and these were her words, for I actually remember them:

"I am Mistress Signy Dimmradaela, Mistress of the Order of the Laurel and Baroness of the Court of the Midrealm, and I wish to speak of the skills of my godson Emrys... Excuse me, I'd like to continue... (whatever she was saying at this time) ... Oh, I didn't want to do that." And words to that effect, which I'm sure were very nobly done, although I didn't hear any more of them, for someone about 6' behind me was weeping during them.

Then the king asked if there was a Pelican to speak of my service, and Master Dafydd the court's herald said, "Well, actually, yes there is!". which all who know him will recognize as his words, so I'm not making this all up. Not all, anyway. And he said something nice about my service, and how I established the Lost Sheep policies of Rouge Scarpe, and instituted the Tracking Database that has become the nails in the coffin of the Black Hole of Midrealm heraldic submissions (because now, although your submission might still be lost, you can KNOW who to BLAME for it!). About all of which I'm damned proud, and so I'll toot away at my horn.

Then I was asked by their graces the king and queen if I would accept the duties of the Laurel, in three parts, and to each part I answered "Ichill", which is "Ich will", which is "I will", but I discovered too late that "Ichill" cannot be projected off the royalty back into the crowd over my shoulders. Which is a pity.

The king asked if there was a medallion, and his herald informed him there was a wreath, and also a medallion, and his grace asked that these be brought forth, and Mistress Alexis brought the legacy medallion of my barony forth, and named those who wore it before me, and Lady Theresa Alverez brought forth my wreath, and got trapped up there momentarily (to her horror) when the king began speaking before she could rise, bow, and leave the dais, so she was forced to kneel where she was at my side, which I did not think a bad thing at all, especially if I should hap to fall to my right, but if I fell to my left or back I was still shit out of luck.

And the king pronounced me Maister Emrys Eustace, Master of the Laurel, and I rose, and there might have been some clapping, or guffawing, or booing, I know not what. And lady Theresa had found a moment to sneak out, and then his grace asked me if I wished to swear fealty, and I did, so I did:

"I here swere feeltee and service
To the coroune of the Middereaume.
To ever enriche the Coroune
With my skilles and abilityes.
To socouren th'artes divers.
To continue th'instruccioun of my dependentes.
T'increse the glorie of the Middereaume,
And to bene worthy of the wrethe I weren.
Thus swere ich, Emrys Eustace."

and then they returned their half of the fealty oath, and removed Oathbinder, and presented their feet together for homage, and I said,

"Les pieds baise, en homage."

which means "I kiss your feet, in homage", and kissed the royal feet.

Then I rose, and my king gave my knight leave to perform the unfinished business he wished, and here I knew his grace was something confused by it all, for he asked Berach to give me "a final blow", by which he cannot mean Berach will never strike me again, for how could anyone imagine that I would not drive him to such corrections? and surely he did not mean that I should not take another blow upon the field, for this is never what it means, so therefore I must imagine that his grace only meant I should never take another blow before him, so that I imagine he intends to forfeit all fights we might have in the future. Or at least that is my best guess. Anyone wanna take bets?

And (I am told) his grace Finn Herjolfsson stood behind me, to catch my body, and Berach asked me, "Emrys will you take a blow from me?" and I said "Yea", and he struck me upon my chest most sound, and I thereto fell to my knees, as befitteth a squire being reminded of his duties and place, and kissed my liege's hand in fealty (for in truth this was the kissingest day that I ever!), and then the king asked if Berach was satisfied, and he said he was (by which he meant that my humbleness satisfied him, and not that my kiss did so, and shame on you for even thinking such a foul thought, you little pervert! And if you didn't, then rest assured that last comment wasn't aimed at you anyway.)

Berach turned and left, and the king proclaimed me Laurel, and Dafydd read out my scroll, most admirably, well, and at great length (nearly) without a vowel astray, for he is a great herald, although he does not speak a single word of Englissh.

I then left the dais, bowed to the crown, and left court. Half my banners preceded me out, and the other half followed, and then the laurels, and then there was a knighting ceremony, but I didn't know the good man and couldn't remember my own name if it wasn't spoken to me in court so much that day, much less his.

Then I spent the day hearing how delightful the children were sweeping, and how well Taffy read, and how nice the banners looked, and noticed the extra banner that my knight had made, and also hearing how I looked like hell and ought to lay down. And later I caught some 20 minutes of sleep, pillowed on my lady's lap, which made it all better. 


                                      

NO, THE DAY ISN'T DONE YET! BEAR WITH ME!

And I apologize that this Ramble isn't as funny as usual, but I'm boring now that I'm Important, so deal with it, there!

Now let me say that it is truly weird, to be cross-posting to all these mutually exclusive lists at once, and I wish to say g'bye to all my friends on the Apprentice list  overhear some news from the super-duper-secret Laurel mtg that day!; and hello to my friends (whom I've already burnt out on reading my post) on the Laurel list. I'll miss you/enjoy your company, and don't forget to come up and say "Hi Broom!", despite my lofty position/having just met you at super-duper-secret Laurel mtgs, as though I remember your name, 'cuz I don't! Ever!

Their highnesses Edmund and Kateryn were made king and queen, which is probably why they called the day "Coronation", and then their royal graces held a willow mtg (which was short) and a laurel mtg (which burst two bladders).

But first, since Master Jean Paul Pierrepont had stuck me with the job of bringing the beer as the newest Laurel, I begged their graces a boon, that I be allowed to start the meeting with two announcements, which they in their noble justice granted, and so did I denounce JP for being a scoundrel and a trickster! and also declared that "I come here not to praise Grizel, but to BURY her!!!". For which the queen was something perplexed, and the king thought maybe he shouldn't grant me any more favors, but they were assured I was honor-bound by earlier promises to say such to the honored assemblage of my peers, and so all was well.

Then their royal graces swore that even as they were in previous reigns War Crowns, intent on that path most truly, now were they Winter Crowns, intent on furthering the Arts & Sciences. And to that effect, they purposed that they should hold up craftsmen of this kingdom to such honors as we had become accustomed to seeing winners of martial tournaments accorded, and in such manner they invited Helen of Greyfells to sit at high table with them, for her much-praised and worthy entries in the A&S competition: a yellow dress based strictly on a Herjolfnes garment, and a matching Herjolfnes hood. And those who knew that her brand spanking new dress was nearly ruined by dye dripping off a wet plume in someone's hat, know now also that after washing the dress is almost completely yellow, with only the slightest faint pink blemish on one arm now.

So, Helen was much honored, and their graces the king and queen did most excellently achieve their purpose, for though her day had been earlier nearly ruined by the apparent loss of a garment and all the work and care put into its creation, later she saw it was still safe, and received much worthy praise, and was raised before the hall in honor for her Art. For which reason, I say again that their graces well set forth their purpose, and that is a glad thing, for is not a great work of a skilled artisan worthy of praise?

And if you have the chance, and have interest in 14th-c garb, then take the time to attend her classes next year at Pennsic or wherever you can, for she is mundanely a professional dressmaker, trained by the best in the most painstakingly dire of traditions, and can well sew and teach. 

I also sat at high table, with my lady, and as usual was out of my seat more than in, but mostly to pass food around so that their graces would not have to do such labor.

Afterwards, we took Helen to the autocrat's house, where she was crashing, and there was a small party of crashers, and it included the Autocrat Katarina, who is my new sister of the Dragon's Heart, a dear award indeed, and obviously well-deserved, and Mistress Rachaelle, who's going to get a new hope chest assembled although her husband and I agree that the one that came with the wedding trousseau is still serviceable, and her husband Master Murdoch, who said unto me "Ooh, baby, come hither my love and kiss me!", by which he undoubtedly thought he would overreach my gall, but figured wrong, didn't he? 'cuz the next thing he knew I was kneeling on his lap and forcing my tongue through his lips, and he nearly burst from the shock, and didn't I warn you this was the kissingest day ever? But in sooth, just so you all know, I much preferred the kisses of my lady to any men I kissed that day, and not even the royal shoe gave me the least little jolt of feelgoodism like hers kisses do, so stop that talk right now! And I don't care if Llew /has/ slept in my bed with me, that doesn't mean I'm gay, except maybe in Kentucky courts, which are stupid anyway!

Then I went home and kissed my lady some more, and the rest is not for the ears of the likes of you, and then crashed, and it was a good day.

Th'end.

  | Broom broom@dnaco.net
  | at The Lady Perrine: 937-222-2330
 \|/ 233 Perrine St, Dayton OH 45410
 /|\ Ministerium honor est, which means:
//|\\ "Laurel, schmaurel, I just wanted the cool squeaky toy!"